Und noch ein Gedichte für euch!!<3
You stole my soul and smashed my dreams
You tore out my heart like it ment nothing
You infested my brain with painful memories
I hated you more than i could bare
I withered away, all I could do was stare
My mind is full of permanant images
The ones you left me to kill my spirit
So lost alone stuck in my fears
All I can do is cry silent tears
I can't live without the things you took
All though I am gone Ill never forget
What you gave to me will come back to you
You can't run nor can you hide
It's your turn to feel all those things that ive felt.
deep into thought i find myself in another world.
a world so quiet, so lonly, and dark.
i keep calling your name.
why wont you answer me?
i love you, you know that right?
please come get me, come take me away.
cant you see? i am reaching out my hand.
the stars are falling, didnt you know?
its not safe here anymore, where are you?
please come get me, hold me tight.
i can't get out alone, please dont let me drown.
the water is getting deeper, the clouds are moving in front of the moon.
i can barley see, are you still up there?
i cant hold on, you know i tried right?
you never came, you let me fade away.
now i am nothing but a faded memory.
maybe one day you will find me.
maybe you will save my soul.
My Letter to God
You knew from the start that I would hate my life.
You sit there and watch me cry every night.
Watching me clench my fists with anger and pain.
What good did it do to create someone like me?
So I can suffer and think of ways to die?
To have nightmares and wake up in a cold sweat?
Why am I here don't you think I would be better off unborn?
Why am I so afraid of things I shouldn't be?
You couldn't just take the fear away so I can stop hiding?
Sometimes I feel as if everyone I know is against me.
They hate me inside and out everything about me is wrong.
Why do I have to feel this way?
People look at me like I am an outcast or a freak.
The day my life is taken from me is the day I can be set free.
Maybe someday you will give me an answer.
Someday you will show me why.
I know everything happens for a reason God.
But please help me to understand this life.
Who is She
She sits at home and dwells in her pain.
She cries at night pushing away from sane,
an outcast alone without a name.
Daydreaming watching the clouds float by.
She's so sad unhappy she can't deny.
She wishes she could fly so very high.
The life she lives is just a big blur.
She wants someone to listen to her.
The rain that falls imitates her tears.
The lock on her door keeps her safe from fears.
The piercing sounds of screams grow as the end nears.
No one ever took the time to understand her.
Now she's not breathing she's gone forever.
It's hard to believe that one day my life will end
No one can bring you back not your family not your friend
IM not sure why life fades away so fast
Not to sure what to do to make it last
I had a dream I flew so high
Too far away to hear a lie
I feel so alone, unwanted, and cold
I hope some day I have someone to love and hold
IM trying to figure out why I feel this way
So sad, unhappy, to much to say
But maybe someone will tell me the reason why
If not, maybe someone will hold me and let me cry
I guess ill have to wait and see
And when I do I will be set free
i felt this pain for much to long
i screamed i cried i wrote a song
searching for ways to make life last
i walked i ran i went so fast
the love the hate the lies IM lost
all i want is love what does it cost?
it rained it snowed and IM still confused
i asked for another chance but you refused
i feel so ugly unwanted and alone
i had enough of this worthless game
everyone i talk to they all seem the same
they step all over you like your nobody
but IM lifting up and making it clear IM somebody
as life goes on i learn more and more
each day i realize i know more than before
no one can stop me IM stronger than you
IM trying my best if only you knew
shame on you for trying to smash my heart
i knew you wanted to from the start
look at me now IM smarter now
guess your not as strong as you said you were
People ask if IM all right.
They don't know I cry at night.
I hate when people say they care.
When I need them they arnt here.
Lying in my bed awake.
Knowing what IM told is fake.
I want to make it go away.
Now I think it's here to stay.
Cold and bitter words I remember.
Way back from last December.
What IM saying is not a lie.
Please don't give me that big sigh.
I will leave you with this rhyme.
Maybe you will believe this time.
I have a shadow that follows me around.
It goes everywhere with me but never makes a sound.
I am the only person who sees it follow.
It's empty inside as if it were hollow.
It watches everything I do all day long.
Sometimes I think it tells me when IM doing something wrong.
It's hard to believe that it's not there.
Sometimes I even wish it were here.
When I lie my head down to sleep.
My heart and soul it will keep.
Protect it while I dream at night.
Wipe my tears and make it all right.
Its weird how time passes by so fast.
It hurts me inside to know its not going to last.
I try so hard to keep my mind clear.
But all I get are these silent tears.
The ones that no one hears.
IM so afraid of death I couldn't handle it.
Its hard for me to go though all this shit.
No one understands the real me.
They will never have the key.
I cant take it anymore.
IM feeling so damn sore.
God please help me be normal.
There's always something wrong with me.
Your the only one who knows how I feel.
The only one who can take it away.
I try so hard to understand.
But I cant.. Simple as that.
God Said No
Late last night I felt so bad.
I cried so long I felt so sad.
Lying there thinking about the past.
Knowing it's gone it left so fast.
Trying to think of ways to die.
IM so unhappy no need to lie.
Heart is broken bleeding now.
I can't fix it tell me how.
You left me here alone and cold.
All I wanted was someone to hold.
Noone is here to wipe my tears.
Can't hold on to many fears.
I have to leave and end this quick.
IM dying now I feel so sick.
Holding the gun to my head.
You can't stop me enough was said.
Now I lay here to young to go.
IM not dead because God said no.
Now I wake up from this dream.
It wasn't real although it may seem.
I fear life
I fear life. I can't handle all this pain and strife.
I want to end it with this knife.
Nobody knows what's wrong with me.
IM screaming on the inside.
IM trying to open up and let it all out, trying to see what it's all about.
My soul is bleeding only needing someone to hold.
My body is cold. I want someone to be told.
IM getting old to fast. I want to make it last.
IM helpless to my fear.
Its almost like no one can hear, my tear hit the floor.
Knowing my heart is tore. My body is so sore.
My vision is black. I cant see anymore.
Dreaming of the day my life will come alive.
My hopes and dreams are smashed.
I don't even know who I am.
My soul is lost. Crying silent tears.
As the end nears it seems so clear.
I wasn't meant to be. Now I see.
It all makes sense. Why me?
This is the end
Today the world will come to an end.
This is the day we die.
Everything will burn and fade away.
Nothing will exist anymore.
Everyone slowly dies.
I stand and watch the flames.
I watch the pain.
I see it all happen before my eyes.
There is nothing I can do.
For I will soon be destroyed.
Nothing will be left of this horrid place.
As I stand and watch I feel no pain.
As I watch the people I hate suffer, I smile,
for they now feel the pain they caused for me.
Now it's my turn.
It will come for me.
It will take my life.
I will burn with the others.
But I care not.
As long as the ones I hate feel my pain.
As long as they know they killed my soul.
I start to burn with the rest of these people.
Most are screaming.
But I just stand and watch.
Nothing can beat the pain some people caused for me.
Now my eye sight grows weaker.
My breaths get shorter.
As I gasp for air I still feel no pain.
My body feels weak.
It's almost my turn to go.
I fall on my knees.
I go blind.
My heart beats faster.
I fall on my face.
My heartbeat slows down.
I take one more gasp of air.
As I exhale the blood drips from my mouth.
I think one last thought.
I think about the people I hate.
Seconds later I am gone.
It's the end.
It's the end of the world as we know it.
An Apology And A Promise
I want to say I'm sorry
for ever doubting you.
I know in my heart that you love me
And our love will always be true.
I hope that you can forgive me
For all the mistakes I've made.
I wouldn't blame you for leaving,
but I'm so glad that you stayed.
Thank you for standing by me
through all my foolish doubts
for wrapping your arms around me
instead of walking out.
Thanks for understanding
that I had problems to address.
Thanks for being patient
while I sort through this whole mess.
Without you I couldn't do this,
so thanks for standing by
for being my rock to lean on
and the shoulder where I can cry.
Never again will I doubt your love
I know now that it's true.
You have done everything for me
now I'll do the same for you.
I'll live my life loving you
more and more each day.
Showing it the best I can
in every little way.
I want to make you happy
and make your dreams come true
After all you've done for me
it's the least that I can do.
I promise now to love you
til we turn old and gray.
I'll make up for all that I've done wrong
each and every day.